Anxiety & Stress – Opening Up About My Personal Struggles | Trying To Find Balance In My Life & Career With Modeling & Youtube, Everyone Face’s Their Own Obstacles w/ Mental Health, & The Never Ending Search To Finding Inspiration | Sanne Vloet
Hey guys,
Today was really tough. I think the right word to describe today is it “sucked”. I don’t think I’ve ever said before out loud, but that goes to show that sometimes we keep our feelings down inside. I tried to film five different times and each time I started to feel anxious, self-doubt crept in, and I made myself believe that what I was doing here with this community wasn’t good enough. I shed a few tears out of frustration with myself and to try to calm down I wrote myself this letter. I know this is different than the usual, but today your comments will be a huge emotional lift so I cannot wait to read them. I realize now that when I feel alone this community is the place for me to come, for all of us to come when things just aren’t going in the perfect direction. Here’s my letter:
“Sanne,
It’s okay not to be okay. It’s completely fine to have a bad day once in a while and when you make mistakes you will grow from them. You rarely ever let things get to you, you’ve always been the rock for all the people in your life that you love so much. All the pressure that you feel inside is only coming from you and the people that support you in your life, community, and in your career only want you to be happy!
If the price of success is your happiness than you need to re-define what success means and move towards a journey with more happiness. You have worked hard for almost two years as a model, content creator, girlfriend, and friend to the people in your life. Over the past year you have traveled non stop for modeling, you’ve made it a priority to create two videos a week, you’ve even opened up about things that you thought you never would.
I know how you feel, because I hear you ask the question “why do I not feel okay”. You don’t need to have a reason for not feeling 100% right now, just be open to all the things you are feeling and remember that this feeling will go away on it’s own. Remember that sometimes a long walk, a sunset, a good workout, can make enough of a difference to change how you feel. The little things sometimes make the biggest difference.”
So at this point I decided to go for a walk and I took my little camera with me to go to pilates and then called Max to come meet me near the studio I like to go to! Just by writing I started to feel better, then I felt that I could share a little bit about how I was feeling and once I finished making the little video I FELT free of the anxiety and self-doubt that had come over me all day.
When I was putting my letter into typing I corrected the words I had misspelled and then I asked my friend Jason to read it over to make sure it made sense the way I wanted it too. I hope you guys are ready for a little bit of my not so perfect self. After all the sharing that we all do sometimes it’s okay to not be okay and yesterday, was one of those days.
Let’s talk a little about mental health, the pressures of the world, how social media can be used more positively, and how we can make this community stronger, and more positive for all of us!
This video is for all of us who sometimes feel like we aren’t strong enough or good enough. The truth is WE ARE more than enough and I just wanted to remind myself and everyone here.
I love you guys so much!
xx
Sanne
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