Category: Parents

[Music] depending on your perspective Emanuel Kant  was either the most boring person on the planet   or a productivity Hacker’s wet dream for over 40  years he woke up every morning at 5:00 a.m. and   wrote for exactly 3 hours he would then lecture  at the same University for exactly 4 hours he  
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followed that up with lunch at the same restaurant  each day then in the afternoon he would go on an   extended walk through the same park on the same  route leaving and returning home at the exact same   time every day K spent his entire life in kbur  Prussia I mean that literally he never left the  
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city despite the ca being an hour away he never  saw it Kant was efficiency personified he was so   mechanical on his habits that his neighbors joke  that they could tune their clocks based on when he   left his apartment each day he would would leave  for his daily walk at 3:30 p.m. have dinner with  
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the same friend every evening and return home to  finish work and go to bed at exactly 10 p.m. it’s   easy for us to scoff at a guy like this what a  loser seriously get a life dude but K was one   of the most important and influential thinkers  in modern history he did more to steer the world  
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from his single room apartment in Prussia than  most Kings and armies ever did before or since   if you’re living in a Democratic Society that  protects indiv idual rights you have can’t to   partially thank for that he was the first person  to ever Envision a global governing body that  
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would guarantee peace across much of the world he  prescribed SpaceTime in such a way that it later   inspired Einstein’s discovery of Relativity  he came up with the idea that animals could   potentially have rights themselves he invented the  philosophy of Aesthetics and beauty and resolved  
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a 200-year philosophical debate in the span  of a couple hundred Pages he reinvented moral   Philosophy from top to bottom over throwing ideas  that had been the basis of Western Civilization   since Aristotle Kant was an intellectual badass  if brains had balls K would have been made out  
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of steel his ideas particularly about ethics  are still discussed and debated in thousands of   universities today and that’s what I want to talk  about K’s moral philosophy and why it matters now   you might be saying really moral philosophy who  cares man show me a shiny Sunset inspirational  
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quote or a cat meme well that right there is  moral philosophy anytime you say who cares or   what’s the big deal you’re essentially questioning  the value of something is it worth your time and   attention is it better or worse than something  else these are all questions of value and they  
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all fall under the umbrella of moral philosophy  our moral philosophy determines what we value what   we care about and what we don’t care about and our  values determine our decisions actions and beliefs   therefore moral philosophy applies to everything  in our lives got it kant’s moral philosophy is  
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unique and counterintuitive can’t believe that  for something to be good it had to be Universal   that is it can’t be right to do something in one  situation and wrong to do it in another if lying   is wrong it has to be wrong all the time it has to  be wrong when everyone does it period if it isn’t  
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always right or always wrong then it cannot be a  valid ethical principle Kant these universalized   ethical principles categorical imperatives rules  to live by that are valid in all contexts in every   situation to every human being well holy [ __ ]  universal laws that dictate all morality for every  
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human being sure you want fries with that it’s  so impossible it sounds ludicrous but Kant made   a hell of an attempt in fact he made a number of  attempts at creating categorical imperatives some   of those attempts were quickly ripped the shreds  by other philosophers but others have actually  
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held up the test of time to some degree one of  them in particular has kind of stuck and in all   of my years reading and studying philosophy  psychology and other Sciences it is one of   the most powerful statements that I’ve ever come  across its implications reach into every part of  
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each person’s life in a single sentence it sums  up the bulk of all of our ethical intuitions and   assumptions and in each situation it points to a  clear direction of how we should be acting and why   okay enough foreplay here’s kant’s rule act that  you use Humanity whether in your own person or in  
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a person of any other always at the same time as  an end and never merely as a means okay what the   actual [ __ ] let’s back up for a second can’t  believe that rationality was sacred when I say   rationality I don’t mean like Sudoku or chess  Grandmaster rationality I mean rationality as  
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the fact that we are the only known creatures in  the universe that are able to make the decisions   weigh options and consider the moral implications  of each and every action basically Consciousness   to the only thing that distinguishes us from the  rest of the universe is our ability to process  
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information and act consciously in the world and  this to him is special it’s exceedingly special   for all we know we are the only shot the universe  has at intelligent self organization therefore   we need to take it seriously and therefore  rationality and protecting conscious Choice  
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must be the basis for all of our moral reasoning  Kant wrote that quote without rationality the   universe would be a waste in vain and without  purpose to K’s mind without intelligence and the   freedom to exercise that intelligence we might  as well just be a bunch of rocks nothing would  
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matter therefore Kant believed that all morality  is derived from the protection and promotion of   rational Consciousness in each individual so how  do you do that well cons rule above let’s restate   State con rule in a more modern language to make  it more easily digestible quote each person must  
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never be treated only as a means to some other  end but also be treated as an end themselves   okay let’s say I’m hungry and I want a burrito I  get in the car and I drive to Chipotle and I order   my usual double meat monster that makes me oh so  happy on a weekly basis in this situation eating  
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the burrito is my end goal it’s ultimately why I’m  doing everything else getting in the car driving   buying gas and so on all these things I do to get  the burrito are the means I.E the things that I   must do in order to achieve my end if you call a  friend to find out how they’re doing calling them  
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is a means finding out how they’re doing is your  end if you leave a party early so you can wake   up in the morning leaving the party is the means  and waking up early is your end means are things   that we do conditionally I don’t want to get in  my car and drive but I want a burrito therefore  
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driving is the means to my burrito end an end is  something that is desired for its own sake it is   the defining motivating factor of our decisions  and behaviors if I wanted to eat a burrito only   because my wife wanted a burrito and I wanted  to make her happy then the burrito is no longer  
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my end it is now a means to an even greater  end making my wife happy and if I only wanted   to make my wife happy so I could hopefully get  laid tonight now my wife’s happiness is a means   to a greater end of sex likely that last example  made you squirm a little bit and think I’m kind  
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of a dirt bag and that’s exactly what Kant is  talking about his argument hell his rule states   that treating any human being as a means to some  other end is the basis of all unethical Behavior   so treating a burrito as a means to my wife’s  end is fine after all as far as I know burritos  
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don’t have rational Consciousness but if I treat  my wife as a means to the end of sex now I am   treating her as a means and Kant would argue that  that is some shade of wrong let’s give K’s Rule   The Common Sense check lying is wrong because  you are misleading another person’s conscious  
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behavior in order to achieve your own goal you  are therefore treating that person as a means   to your own end therefore lying is unethical  cheating is unethical for a similar reason you   are violating the expectations of other rational  and sentient beings for your own personal aims  
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you are treating the rules and expectations  agreed to with others as a means to your own   personal end that is wrong violence same deal  you were treating another person as a means to   some greater political or personal end bad very  bad cons formulation checks all the boxes that  
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we would expect from a theory of morality but it  goes Way Way Beyond Common Sense Morality In fact   I will try to argue that K rule plausibly extends  to pretty much everything that we value is right   and good today check it out the moral implications  of K’s rule the list below is incomplete some of  
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the items K explicitly wrote about but others are  extrapolations that I’ve taken from his work and   applied to my own values my hope is that by the  end of it you will see the incredible flexibility   of the single moral maximum to extend almost all  areas of human life example one laziness okay I  
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can be as lazy is the next Guy full disclosure  and I often feel guilty about it but we all know   that [ __ ] off in the short term inevitably harms  Us in the long term but for whatever reason this   short-term gain versus long-term loss calculation  never seems to inspire or move us but that’s not  
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why Kant thinks it’s wrong in fact Kant would say  that this is the wrong way to think about laziness   it’s insufficient comp believed that we all had a  moral imperative to do the best that we can at all   times but he didn’t say to do your best because of  self-esteem or personal utility or contributing to  
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society or whatever he went even further than  that he argued you should do your best because   anything less is to treat ourselves as a means  rather than an end yes you can treat yourself   as a means as well you’re sitting on the couch  refreshing Twitter for the 28th time and you’re  
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treating your mind and your attention as a mere  pleasure receptacle you are not maximizing the   potential of your Consciousness in fact you are  using your Consciousness as a means to stimulate   your emotional ends this is not only bad Kant  would argue but it’s unethical you are actively  
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harming yourself example two addiction Believe It  or Not Kant wasn’t a total party pooper he enjoyed   some wine with his lunch he smoked the pipe but  only at the same time each morning and only one   bowl of tobacco Kant was not necessarily anti-un  what he was against though was pure escapism  
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he wrote that using alcohol or other means of  escaping one’s own life was unethical because   it requires you to use your rational mind and  freedom as a means to some other end in this   case getting [ __ ] up comp believed in facing  one’s problems he believed that suffering is  
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sometimes warranted and even necessary in life  we tend to judge the immorality of addiction by   the damage it causes to others but Kant believed  that first overindulgence was fundamentally the   act of being immoral to oneself the harm it  did to others was merely collateral damage it  
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was a failure to confront the reality of one’s  own mind and Consciousness and this failure is   akin to lying to oneself or cheating oneself out  of precious life potential and to can’t lying to   yourself is just as unethical as lying to others  example three people pleasing and seeking approval  
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okay I know it’s not a good strategy to be kissing  people’s asses all the time but unethical really   isn’t being really nice to people and making them  happy an ethical thing to do well not necessarily   seeking approval in people pleasing forces you  to alter your actions and speech to no longer  
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reflect what you actually think and feel so  right there you are already treating yourself   as a means rather than an end but it gets worse  because if you alter your speech and behavior   in order to make others like you then you are  also treating them as a means to your end you  
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are altering and manipulating their perceptions  of you in order to Garner a pleasant response   from them K would undoubtedly argue that this  is also unethical how dare you tell me my shirt   looks good on me you ethical piece of [ __ ] I’ve  written that length about how people pleasing and  
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seeking approval leads to toxic relationships  but again as usual Kant takes it even further   because Kant was [ __ ] hardcore like that  example four manipulation or coercion even if   you’re not lying but you’re communicating with an  attitude and a purpose of gaining something from  
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someone without their full knowledge or explicit  consent then you are being unethical K was big on   fully informed consent he believed it was the  only way for there to be healthy interactions   between individuals it was Radical for his time  and it’s something that people still struggle to  
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accept today there are two areas in the modern  world where I think that consent issue is huge   and K would have a lot to say about it the first  is obvious sex and dating under K’s rule anything   short of explicit fully informed and fully sober  consent is ethically out of bounds this is a hot  
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button issue today and I personally think people  make it far more complicated than it needs to be   it basically just means being respectful people  assume this means asking for permission 20 times   on a date but it’s not all you have to do is  State how you feel ask them how they feel and  
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then respect whatever response comes back to  you that’s it it’s not complicated respect was   also sacred within K’s moral framework because  Kant believe that all conscious creatures have a   fundamental dignity that must be respected at all  times and by everyone for Kant consent was the act  
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of demonstrating respect anything that didn’t lead  towards consent between two people was to some   degree disrespectful I know that makes Kant sound  like an angry grandmother but the implications   of the consent issue are far reaching and wide  touching every human relationship that we have  
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the other modern area that is problematic is sales  and advertising pretty much every marketing tactic   is built around treating people as a means to some  end that is making money in fact Kant struggled   much of his life with the ethical implications of  capitalism and wealth inequality he believed that  
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it was impossible for anyone to amass a fortune  without some degree of manipulation or coercion   along the way therefore he was dubious of the  entire system he wasn’t anti- capitalist per se   and communism didn’t exist yet but the Staggering  wealth inequality of his time did make him uneasy  
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he believed Anyone Who Had Mass the fortune  had a moral imperative to give much of it   away to the starving masses example five bigotry  might as well throw it in here especially since   Enlightenment thinkers were Infamous for having  pretty racist views which were common in the time  
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interestingly K despite saying some pretty awful  [ __ ] about race early in his career turned the   intellectual corner and realized later in his life  that no race has any right to subjugate any other   it makes sense after all racism and other forms  of bigotry are textbook cases of treating other  
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people as means rather than ends Kant came to the  conclusion that if all rationality is sacred then   there’s nothing permitting European special  privileges over any other nations or races   he also became vehemently anti-colonialist K  argued that regardless of race the violence  
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and oppression required to subjugate populations  would destroy people’s Humanity in the process   it was the ultimate unethical institution this  was completely radical for the time radical to   the point of being considered absurd by many  but Kant reasoned that the only way to prevent  
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war and oppression was to form an international  government that organized and bound nation states   together centuries later the United Nations would  largely be based on his vision example six the   duty of self-improvement most philosophers of the  Enlightenment believed that the best way to live  
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was to increase happiness as much as possible and  to reduce suffering as much as possible as well   this approach to ethics is called utilitarianism  and is still the predominant view held by many   thinkers today K had a completely different take  on how to go about improving the world let’s call  
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it the Michael Jackson Maxim because K like  Michael believed that if you want to make the   world a better place take a look at yourself  and make that change but instead of grabbing   his crotch comp made his argument with brutal  rationality and here’s how he argued it comp  
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believed that generally it is impossible to  know whether a person deserves to be happy or   suffer because you can never truly know what their  intentions and aims were when they acted similarly   even if you should make others happy there’s no  way to precisely know how to make them happy you  
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do not know their feelings values or expectations  you do not know the implications your actions will   have on them on top of that what actually  constitutes suffering or happiness in most   non-extreme situations is unclear your divorce  may cause you incredible pain today but in a year  
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it might be the best thing that ever happened  to you you may relish the joy of a celebration   with friends but maybe it’s distracting you from  pursuing something that would prevent more future   suffering therefore K argued the the only logical  way to improve the world is through improving  
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ourselves this is because the only thing we can  truly experience with any certainty is ourselves   K defined self-improvement is developing  the ability to adhere to the categorical   imperative and he saw self-improvement as a duty  an undebatable obligation put on us all to K the  
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reward or punishment for not following one’s  duty was not in heaven or hell but in a life   made for oneself adherence to morality produced  not only a better life for yourself but a better   life for all those around you similarly failure  to adhere to morality would produce unnecessary  
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suffering for oneself and for those around you con  rule has a ripple effect your improved ability to   be honest with yourself will increase how honest  you are with others and your honesty with others   will influence them to be more honest with  themselves which will then help them improve  
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their lives this is true for all aspects of K’s  rule whether it’s honesty productivity charity or   consent the Michael Jackson Maxum suggest that  kant’s rule once adopted by enough people will   generate a snowball effect in the world enacting  more positive change than any calculated policy  
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or institution the duty of self-respect Kant  intuitively understood that there is a fundamental   link between our respect for ourselves and our  respect for the world the way we interact with   our own psyche is the template which we apply to  our interactions with others and little progress  
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can be made with others until we’ve made progress  with ourselves he would likely be disgusted with   the self-esteem movement today seeing it as just  another way of treating people as a means to some   end of feeling better self-respect isn’t about  feeling better self-respect is about knowing  
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your own value knowing that every human no matter  who they are deserves basic rights and dignities   that every Consciousness is sacred and must be  treated as such Kant would argue that telling   ourselves that we are worthless and shitty is  just as wrong as telling others that they are  
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worthless and shitty lying to ourselves is just as  unethical as lying to others harming ourselves is   just as repugnant as harming others self-love  and self-care are therefore not something you   learn about or practice they are something you are  ethically called on to cultivate within yourself  
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even if they are all you have left the impact  of kant’s philosophy Khan’s philosophy if you   dive into it is riddled with inconsistencies  and issues but the power of His original ideas   is undoubtedly changed the world and strangely  when I came across them a year ago they changed  
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me I had spent most of my 20s pursuing many of  the items on the list above but I pursued them   for practical and transactional reasons I pursued  them as a means because I thought that they would   make my life better meanwhile the more I worked  at it the emptier I felt but reading Kant was an  
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epiphany and only 80 Pages Kant Swept Away decades  worth of assumptions and beliefs he showed me that   what you actually do doesn’t matter as much as  the purpose behind doing it and until you find the   right purpose you haven’t found much of anything  at all K wasn’t always a hum drum roue obsessed  
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dork he wasn’t always the mayor of boreville in  fact in kant’s younger years he was a bit of a   party Hound as well he would stay up late drinking  wine and playing cards with his friends he’d sleep   late and eat too much and host big parties it  wasn’t until he turned 40 that he dropped it  
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all and developed the routine life he later made  famous he said that he developed this routine at   40 because he realized the moral implications  of his actions and decided that he would no   longer allow himself to waste the precious time or  energy his Consciousness had left Kant called this  
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developing character AKA building a life designed  around maximizing your own potential he believed   most people can’t develop true character until  they reach middle age because until then they   are still too seduced by the fancies and whims of  the world blown this way and that from excitement  
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to Despair and back again we’re too obsessed  with accumulating more means and are hopelessly   oblivious to the ends that drive us to develop  character a person must Master their own actions   and master themselves and while few of us can  accomplish that in a lifetime Kant believed  
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it’s something we each have a duty to work towards  in fact he believed it was the only thing to work [Music] towards what’s up everybody Mark  Manson here and what you just heard is an   excerpt from the number one New York Times  bestseller everything is [ __ ] a book about  
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Hope be sure to check it out and uh check out  my YouTube channel it’s um you’re on [Music] [Music] YouTube

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So then, here is a conception of  nature as something you must trust;   outside nature – the birds, the bees,  the flowers, the mountains, the clouds,   and inside nature, human nature. Now  nature isn’t trustworthy, completely.  
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It will sometimes let you down with a wallop, but  that’s the risk you take, that’s the risk of life.   What is the alternative? “I  do not trust nature at all.   It has got to be watched.” You know what that  leads to? It leads to 1984 and Big Brother,  
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it leads to the totalitarian state   where everybody is his brother’s policeman,  where everybody is watching everybody else   to report them to the authorities. Where  you can’t trust your own motivations,  
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where you have to have a psychoanalyst  in charge of you all the time to think,   to be sure that you do not think  dangerous thoughts or peculiar thoughts.   And you report all peculiar  thoughts to your analyst  
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and your analyst would keep a record of  them and report them to the government.   And everybody is busy in  keeping records of everything.   It’s much more important to record  what happens than what happens.  
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This is already eating us up, it’s much more  important that you have your books right   than that you conduct your business in a good  way. In universities it is much more important   that the registrar’s records be in order than  the library be well-stocked. After all, you know,  
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your grades are all locked up in safes,  and protected from thievery and pilfering,   and they are the most valuable property that  the university has; the library can go hang.   Then further more, the main functioning of a  university is, as a sensible person would imagine,  
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to teach students and to do research. So  the faculty should be the most important   thing in the university, on the contrary, the  administration is the most important thing.   The people who keep the records, who  make the game rules up. So the faculty  
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are always being obstructed by the administration  and forced into irrelevant meetings,   and to do everything but scholarship. Do you know what scholarship means, or what   a school means? The original  meaning of schola is leisure.  
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We talk of a “scholar and a gentleman” because a  gentleman was a person who had a private income   and he could afford to be a scholar. He did  not have to earn a living and therefore he   could study the classics and  poetry and things like that.  
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Today nothing is more busy than a school. They  make you work, work, work because you have to get   through on schedule. There are expedited courses,  and you go to school so as to get a union card,   to get a Ph.D. or something you could  earn on living. So, on the whole, it’s a  
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contradiction of scholarship. Scholarship  is to study everything that is unimportant,   not necessary for survival, all the  charming irrelevancies of life.   So you see, the thing is this, if  you do not have room in your life  
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for the playful, life is not worth living. All  work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, but if the   only reason for which Jack plays is that he can  work better afterwards, he is not really playing.   He is playing because it is good for him,  
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he is not playing at all. You have  to be able to be a true scholars,   you have to cultivate an attitude to life in which  you are not trying to get anything out of it.   You pick up a pebble on the beach: look at it,  beautiful, don’t try to get a sermon out of it.  
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Sermons-in-stones and God-in-everything be damned  – just enjoy it! Do not feel that you have got to   salve your conscience by saying that this  is for the advancement of your aesthetic   understanding. Enjoy the pebble.  If you do that, you become healthy.  
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You become able to be a loving, helpful human  being. But if you can’t do that, if you can only   do things because they’re somehow, you are going  to get something out of it, you are a vulture.   So,  
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we have to learn, you don’t have, you  know, you don’t have to go on living,   but it is a great idea, it is a great thing if you  can learn what the Chinese call “purposelessness.”   They think nature is purposeless.  
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When we say something is purposeless, it  is a put-down. There is no future in it,   it is a washout. When they hear the word  purposeless they think that’s just great.   It is like the waves washing against the shore,  going on and on, forever, with no meaning. A  
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great Zen master said, as his death poem, just  before he died, “From the bathtub, to the bathtub,   I have uttered stuff and nonsense.” The bathtub  in which the baby is washed at birth, the bathtub   in which the corpse is washed before burial,  all this time I have said many nonsenses.  
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Like the birds in the trees go twee,  twee, twee. What is it all about?   Everybody tries to say, “Ah, yes, it is a mating  call – purposeful. They are trying to get their   mates, you know, by attracting them with a song.”  That’s why they have colors, and why butterflies  
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have eye-like designs on them for self-protection,  an engineering view of the universe.   Why do we do that? We say, “Well,  it is because they need to survive.”   But why survive? What is that for? Well, to survive.  
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See, human beings really are a lot of tubes,  and all living creatures are just tubes.   These tubes have to put things in one end and let  them go out at the other. Then they get clever   about it and they develop nerve ganglia on one  end of the tube – the eating end called a head.  
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And that has got eyes and ears, and it has  little organs and antennae, thing like this,   and that help you define things to put in one  end so that you can let them out the other.   Well, while you are doing this, you see,  the stuff going through wears the tube out  
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and so, the show can go on, the tubes  have complicated ways of making other   tubes which will go on doing the same thing,  in at one end, out the other. And they say,   “Well, that is terribly serious. That is awfully  important. We have got to keep on doing this.”  
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Then when the Chinese say nature is  purposeless this is a compliment.   It is like the idea of the Japanese word yugen.   They describe yugen as watching wild  geese fly and be hidden in the clouds;  
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as watching a ship vanish  behind the distant island;   as wandering on and on in a great  forest with no thought of return.   Haven’t you done this? Haven’t you gone on a walk  with no particular purpose in mind? You carry a  
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stick with you and you occasionally hit it  at old stumps, wander along and sometimes   twiddle your thumbs. It is at that moment  that you are a perfectly rational human being;   you have learned purposelessness.  All music is purposeless.  
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Is music getting somewhere? If it were, I mean,  if the aim of music or the symphony were to   get to the final bar, the best conductor  would be the one who got there fastest.   See, dancing, when you dance do you aim to  arrive at a particular place on the floor?  
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Is that the idea of dancing?   The aim of dancing is to dance. Is the present.  This is exactly the same in our life.   We think life has a purpose. I  remember the preachers who used to say,  
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when I was a small boy, I’ve always heard it, we  must follow God’s purpose, his purpose for you   and his purpose for me. When I asked these  cats what the purpose was, they never   knew! They never knew what it was, they had  a hymn “God is working his purpose out as  
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year succeeds to year. God is working his  purpose out and the time is drawing near.   The time on the earth should be full of the glory  of God as the waters cover the sea.” What’s the   glory of God? Well, they weren’t quite sure. I’ll tell you what it is.  
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In heaven all those angels are gathered around  the glory of God. That is to say the which than   which there’s no whicher. Catholics call it the  beatific vision, the Jews call it the shekhinah.   There all are angels standing around and  saying hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah. It  
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means nothing. They’re just having a ball. See, that’s what happened in the beginning.   When the God created the universe it  was created like all star, all planets,   all galaxies, they are vaguely spherical.  He created this and said have a ball.  
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But before he said that, he said  you must draw the line somewhere.   That was the real thing he said first,  before ‘let there be light’ that came later.   First thing was you must draw the line  somewhere. Otherwise nothing would happen.  
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You’ve got to have the good guys, the bad  guys, you’ve got to have this, you’ve got   to have that, the black and white, light and  darkness. You must draw the line somewhere.   Now, here is the choice. Are you going to trust it  or not? If you do trust it, you may get let down,  
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and this “it” is yourself, your own nature and all  nature around you. There are going to be mistakes,   but if you don’t trust it at all,  you are going to strangle yourself.   You are going to fence yourself around with  rules and regulations and laws and prescriptions  
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and policemen and guards – and  who’s going to guard the guards.   And who’s going to look after Big Brother to  be sure he doesn’t do something stupid. No-go.   Supposing I get annoyed with somebody in the  audience and I’m going to throw this ashtray  
00:11:53
at them but I don’t want to hit my friend sitting  next to that person. I want to be absolutely sure   this ashtray hits that individual. And so I don’t  trust myself to throw it. I have to carry it along   and be sure I hit that person on a head. See,  I don’t throw it because I can’t let go of it.  
00:12:16
To throw it I must let go of it . To live I must have faith.   I must trust myself to the totally  unknown, I must trust myself, to a nature   which does not have a boss. Because  a boss is a system of mistrust.