It was the best of shows…
It was the worst of shows…
And six years later, we still can’t let it go.
Here are the moments guaranteed to stir anger and angst in your heart.
13. When the series got a new theme song.
When It Happened: The premiere of Season 2
Why You’re Not Over It: Because it is still the most irritating thing you’ve ever heard. Theme songs are supposed to be cheesy, but this is so desperately and atrociously campy that you’ve been scarred for life.
12. When you found out Mark was secretly video taping Jenny and Shane.
When It Happened: Season 2, Episode 5
Why You’re Not Over It: This show made almost every heterosexual man seem creepy and gross, and Mark the Roommate was a prime example. Charming, and even sweet, Mark was a stand-in for every guy friend you thought you had and made you feel kind of weird about it.
11. When Alice had a meltdown after Dana broke up with her.
When It Happened: Season 3, Episode 3
Why You’re Not Over It: Because breakups with your best friend are hard, but not THAT hard. Alice, and The L Word writers, took it way too far.
10. When Dana died from breast cancer.
When It Happened: Season 3, Episode 10
Why You’re Not Over It: BECAUSE DANA FUCKING DIED. Not only was it a heartbreaking loss, but Dana was also one of the most well-developed, least irritating characters on the show. Losing her halfway through the series made drinking an absolute necessity to get through the rest.
9. When Alice broke down and cried while “You Are My Sunshine” played in the background.
When It Happened: Season 3, Episode 10
Why You’re Not Over It: Because if watching Dana die wasn’t bad enough, your already bleeding heart was further eviscerated seconds later when you had to watch her best friend and former lover literally fall apart to the tune of a beloved children’s lullaby. Ergo, trauma.
8. When Max became the worst stereotype ever.
When It Happened: Over the course of Seasons 3 through 5, taking an absolute nosedive in Season 6
Why You’re Not Over It: Because his whole storyline constantly made you think, What the actual fuck? Max was an all right guy, but the series made his gender identity the only point of his story. He had every stereotype about trans identity shoved into his character, dehumanizing and often demonizing him as a trans man. It was painful to watch.
7. When Shane left Carmen at the altar.
When It Happened: The Season 3 finale
Why You’re Not Over It: 1) Because they were a beautiful couple, 2) because Carmen was a beautiful person, and 3) because Carmen gave you hope that Shane wasn’t doomed to remain an angsty overgrown teenager for the rest of her life. Alas.
6. When Jenny’s book Lez Girls became a movie.
When It Happened: Season 4, Episode 7 through the series finale
Why You’re Not Over It: The series became a show about a movie that was about the characters in the show. Among the many plot twists and turns that made your brain hurt, this was one of the most ridiculous.
5. When Jenny spoke.
When It Happened: Every episode.
Why You’re Not Over It: Because Jenny didn’t have to be so awful, but the writers couldn’t get her right. Everything from her sexuality to her trauma to her attempt at living life was caricatured into a flaming hot mess. You kind of felt bad for her, but mostly you hated her guts.
4. When Eva “Papi” Torres mysteriously disappeared from the series.
When It Happened: After Season 4
Why You’re Not Over It: First of all, because Papi was fine. Second, because she was the second Latina character to disappear from the show unceremoniously (after Carmen), and her exit was never again referenced or explained until a brief reappearance in Season 6.
3. When Shane and Jenny started “dating.”
When It Happened: Season 6, Episode 2
Why You’re Not Over It: Because this is a coupling only the sickest mind could conjure. Jenny and Shane had an enviable friendship, but the idea of them as lovers made your skin crawl.
2. When Max’s boyfriend left him pregnant and alone.
When It Happened: Season 6, Episode 4
Why You’re Not Over It: BECAUSE COME ON. His whole narrative is shat upon and then he ends up with this? Not cool, L Word writers. Not cool.
1. When the entire sixth season. Just.
When It Happened: When you thought things couldn’t get worse
Why You’re Not Over It: Because nothing — actually nothing — made any sense.
A simple show about queer lady life became a weird murder mystery in which all the characters existed in an alternative universe where Jenny and Shane could be a thing and that chick from Saved By the Bell was briefly relevant.
