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I’ve never touched her
Author: Leaman Ralph
Really sugar is shaky because it originates from a straight stick see the play is Granny yes Grandma plus new style luv MaryJane so listen (Granny Apple last years blue ribbon production winner AKA) I, I, I ain't on the right side of my house Jane something or the other is in my room: finally after an extermination Grannie speaks once more "let my (old man) Pacman step on it". See it is home on the range so solo as it be truity speaks got a problem it is your own. But alter scenario: Z/n time; narcotics I got that candy s.p.ee..d360 Bar itch its' and Mickey Mouse for the Sultan 7 1 4er well a hem a hem, it went early in the morning like a smack chanting sugar structure 7 -one 1 +eleven and 4 do an ate 'er 8 eight 'er? Well that aint nice. NARCO says do you know them numbers change (response) Yes it is a FiX they are MF's Ope yeah Ope Douglas is it.
Surrounded by Alkaloid is both Mary and Grandma in an never ending circle of membership. French mandates declare put up their dukes... ZEN Pepsi can talk half Chocolate and your ole man Pacman down in Cuba posing as the worlds one and only Coffee Wizard "back 1:1" tis Coffee time... ||
![Relax, America! WH releases proof that Obama’s on top of Syria [photo]](https://effectsofanxiety.net/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/1430192813443-superman-obama.jpg)
Relax, America! WH releases proof that Obama’s on top of Syria [photo]
http://twitter.com/#!/whitehouse/status/373551078257606656
The White House didn’t think it was important enough for us to get live coverage of the president’s remarks on Syria, but this photo should totally put our minds at ease:
http://twitter.com/#!/redsteeze/status/373547760974188545They’re serious, you guys! Just look at Obama’s face. Look at the thoughtful positioning of Holder, Kerry, and Biden’s fists.
http://twitter.com/#!/Timbotown/status/373552436080021504So focused. Like a laser! There’s only one thing missing:
http://twitter.com/#!/GayPatriot/status/373548544525086720Unfortunately, Magic couldn’t be there today. Guess the Super Friends will have to settle for the next best thing:
http://twitter.com/#!/JohnEkdahl/status/373550747004465152***
Related:
White House: You guys, here’s a pic proving Obama talked to Netanyahu on #Obamaphone
White House releases photographic proof that Privacy Oversight Board exists
White House releases more ‘proof’ that Obama doesn’t think girls have cooties
White House: Hey, here’s a pic that proves Obama is totally focused on national security
White House: Serious You Guys, we have proof Obama is on the Egypt situation [photo]
Leading from behind? Obama brings up the rear on bike ride after Egypt briefing [pics]
Oh baba-booey: Howard Stern’s Twitter account hacked?
http://twitter.com/#!/jdonels/status/294933475398664194
Howard Stern may be the self-proclaimed King of all Media, but even kings are vulnerable. Something seems a bit … off about Stern’s most recent tweets, and many of his followers have taken notice:
@howardstern you’re waxing philosophical today…what’s up?
— andrew (@andrew91271) January 25, 2013
This does not sound like Howard lol RT @howardstern: My definition of soul: you with a capital Y. What’s yours?
— Bittersweet Symphony (@stonedandcrazy) January 25, 2013
Apparently, based on his tweets, @howardstern has lost his mind.
— White Tyson (@tc_humble) January 25, 2013
@howardstern What the hell are u smoking? You’re freaking me out!!
— Coleene (@irish_queene) January 25, 2013
@howardstern are you ok.
— Jim Leary (@JimJleary) January 25, 2013
See for yourself:
Making a bouquet just cut from my garden to take to Fergie.
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) January 25, 2013
So happy to know Drew Barrymore is my neighbor I now have some one to share my garden veggies
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) January 25, 2013
You live in a Paradise on Earth right in your own backyard. yes I really do feel that way.
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) January 25, 2013
The biggest lesson is to realize you are not your thoughts. YOU are the OBSERVER of your thoughts . #SuperSoulSunday
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) January 25, 2013
you don’t have a relationship…you have wounds#iylanafixmylife rt oskiew appreciated I would love more tweets from you similar to this one.
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) January 25, 2013
My definition of soul: you with a capital Y. What’s yours?
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) January 25, 2013
Not exactly the sort of material you’d expect from a guy who tweets stuff like this:
Let’s clear this up. I love the show girls and the star of the show. Yes, she’s heavy but you should see the roll of jello on my belly.
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) January 9, 2013
Yes! Even with working out it still looks evil. rt @danriverz is your ass as gross as it was in your Fartman costume?
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) January 9, 2013
I will beg johnny to do it. rt JB directing rt @lavu2 @howardstern @ohsnapjbsmoove PLEASE do urine detective wit Johnny Knox on @howardtv
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) January 9, 2013
HOWARD STERN: Ronnie demonstrates his bizarre butt-cleansing technique f…: youtu.be/6V5uR-J0lcQ via @youtube
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) January 22, 2013
So what’s the deal?
I think @howardstern has been hacked.
— timheidecker (@timheidecker) January 25, 2013
@howardstern Did someone hack your twitter account???This is way too mushy.#ISpeakYourName
— Brooke Rothenberg (@BRothenbergN12) January 25, 2013
@howardstern someones putting tweets in your mouth!! h a c k e d !!
— Mariann F Brooklyn (@MFBrooklyn) January 25, 2013
@howardstern In case anybody was wondering: Howard’s Twitter has been hacked. This isn’t him posting these weird things.
— Der (@DerMurg) January 25, 2013
@howardstern think you got hacked bud. Someone is spewing hippy nonsense on your Twitter dime.
— nycvilla (@nycvilla) January 25, 2013
@howardstern has someone kidnapped your Twitter account or did someone steal your balls?
— James Travieso (@magicbuc) January 25, 2013
@howardstern Come ON, Howard. Did @oprah hack your twitter?
— miss molly ⛳ (@missmollymaine) January 25, 2013
Good question. One thing’s for sure: this certainly doesn’t sound like the Howard Stern we know and lov- er, the Howard Stern we know.
Read more: http://twitchy.com/2013/01/25/oh-baba-booey-howard-sterns-twitter-account-hacked/
Greg Abbott asks ‘2 reasons Texans dislike Obama’; Responses pour in
http://twitter.com/#!/GregAbbott_TX/status/447885497801527296
Texas gubernatorial candidate Greg Abbott had a fairly straightforward request, and a great many people were happy to respond:
http://twitter.com/#!/ladyliberty01/status/447887401537396736 http://twitter.com/#!/txblondegrad/status/447890075691802624 http://twitter.com/#!/craig_million/status/447893029504815104 http://twitter.com/#!/texoilKA/status/447898604460449792.@GregAbbott_TX 1. Massive new regs. & policies that kill off jobs/economic recovery. 2. Gutting defense spending in face of global crisis.— Tom T. (@VRWCTexan) March 24, 2014
http://twitter.com/#!/RodWistrand/status/447896615693471744 http://twitter.com/#!/willyz/status/447893876393529344 http://twitter.com/#!/craig_million/status/447893029504815104 http://twitter.com/#!/Fritzster/status/447889872884211713 http://twitter.com/#!/tstrike/status/447889106370981888@GregAbbott_TX 1. He deceives people. 2. Pro-abortion & anti-2nd amendment— SuperMomWebb (@JoyFilledMom) March 24, 2014
http://twitter.com/#!/GrammieJean/status/447891864146821120 http://twitter.com/#!/jctreadaway/status/447887819185205248 http://twitter.com/#!/JasonBWhitman/status/447886091916304384Naturally Abbott’s request brought out some Obama defenders:
http://twitter.com/#!/KevinSutherland/status/447888676811702272 http://twitter.com/#!/TheAustinFitz/status/447889065480708096Do not insult Hope & Change:
http://twitter.com/#!/halljh1720/status/447890050282307584 http://twitter.com/#!/CueballAnusFoul/status/447899802567589889 http://twitter.com/#!/CueballAnusFoul/status/447900184156983296 http://twitter.com/#!/Plumazul/status/447898104168448000 http://twitter.com/#!/horndsgn/status/447890320844288000According to polls, Greg Abbott holds a double digit lead over Wendy Davis in the race to be the next governor of Texas.
Dads Are Rallying For “Amazon Mom” To Change Its Name To “Amazon Family”
The retail giant’s family-discount program is only known as Amazon Mom in the United States — it’s known as Amazon Family in other countries. #AmazonFamilyUS
1. Parent’s Twitter and Facebook feeds across the US have been lighting up with the following graphic this morning:
Christ Routly / Via daddydoctrines.com
2. The movement has largely been inspired by the passing of Oren Miller, the father and blogger behind bloggerfather.com.
Oren Miller / Via bloggerfather.com
Miller was a giant in the online parenting community who had long questioned Amazon.com’s branding of their family rewards program as “Amazon Mom” in the US, and was championing for a change.
3. Miller wrote often about why he felt the exclusionary name was an issue, but never more succinctly than in his February 2013 post promoting another dad’s petition to change the name to Amazon Family, as it was known in Canada, the UK and elsewhere.
“Please sign that petition. Please. It’s not about a name and it’s not about me personally being offended and it’s not about stupid emails about yoga classes. It’s about a company that looks at the US, then looks at England, and then decides that over there, parent equals mom or dad, while here, well, we’re not ready for that yet.” – Oren Miller
5. After his death, the community Miller touched so deeply rallied, taking up the #AmazonFamilyUS torch as their own.
10. Doug French, founder of the Dad 2.0 Summit, an annual meeting of dads and marketers, spoke to BuzzFeed Life about the #AmazonFamilyUS movement:
“Amazon is a smart, powerful, and progressive company with as recognizable a global brand as there is. Bringing ‘Amazon Family’ in line with its branding all over the rest of the world would be a strong show of support for dads in the US.”
11. So far the #AmazonFamilyUS petition has over 3000 signatures.
Dads are an integral part of the village. A village needs a vendor. Be ours, @Amazon! #AmazonFamilyUS https://t.co/RXJsYWnG0L
— AHDMatters (@(Dada) Mike Heenan)
12. BuzzFeed Life has reached out to Amazon Mom for comment.
Read more: http://www.buzzfeed.com/morganshanahan/dads-are-rallying-for-amazon-mom-to-change-their-name-to-ama
we surprised myself with this
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Indifferent OJ
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Having A Basement Is Great, But It’s Even Better When Your Basement Is Like THIS.
Man caves are a part of the everyday lexicon. They’re the ultimate place for a guy to head to after working a long, hard day. Man caves are where men hide when the wife isn’t too happy about [insert subject of argument here].
And we’re discussing guys here, so it’s only natural for men to compete with others for the coolest cave around. With bragging rights up for grabs, you won’t believe the lengths some will go to for the win!
1.) The ultimate sports memorabilia collector.
2.) A wood worker’s dream.
3.) You’ve seen too many horror movies.
4.) Zombie proof.
5.) For the Hans Zimmer fan.
6.) Nostalgic to a fault.
7.) No, I’m Batman.
8.) LA party central?
9.) Little brothers get Luigi.
10.) An audiophile’s paradise.
11.) For every Trekkie’s Christmas list.
12.) 20,000 times we’ve searched for Captain Nemo.
13.) Because you always need to work on your short game.
Think those are crazy-awesome? Check out the rest!
Read more: http://viralnova.com/ultimate-man-caves/
Obama’s ‘Julia’ makes her radio debut tonight on FTR Radio; Update: Podcast now available
http://twitter.com/#!/FingersMalloy/status/198068272900476928
"I have no eyes yet I see"- #Julia Listen to the most anticipated interview since __ (fill in the blank) 10pmET #FTRRadio
— Fingers Malloy (@FingersMalloy) May 3, 2012
No word on how having no mouth will impact her ability to respond to interview questions.
Catch this exclusive interview tonight at 10 p.m. ET on FTR Radio.
Update: Listen to The Snark Factor interview with Julia here:
We interviewed #Julia last nite on The #SnarkFactor. Listen,it will change your life http://t.co/JeKhJT3d #FTRRadio #tcot
— Fingers Malloy (@FingersMalloy) May 4, 2012
Read more: http://twitchy.com/2012/05/03/obamas-julia-makes-her-radio-debut-tonight-on-ftr-radio/
John McCain names romantic comedy best depicting ‘bromance’ with Obama
http://twitter.com/#!/TheLeadCNN/status/365567760543137792
Yes, your eyes didn’t deceive you. During an interview on CNN, Arizona Sen. John McCain was asked what romantic comedy best represented his “bromance” with President Obama. McCain went back a few decades for an answer:
http://twitter.com/#!/zbyronwolf/status/365568024700387328That might explain why McCain’s meetings with Obama always end with Maverick saying, “baby, you’re the greatest.”
Here’s the video. We think the Senator might have even blushed:
As Dr. Evil once asked, “it got weird, didn’t it?”
http://twitter.com/#!/dorseyshaw/status/365570087954026496There goes the man the GOP nominated to defeat Barack Obama in 2008. Looking back, it’s hard to believe that didn’t work out for the Republicans, isn’t it?
Update:
The appropriate accompanying photo, by way of Sooper Mexican:
