Read more: http://ifunny.com/pictures/my-parents-got-me-book-christmas/
Author: Leaman Ralph
Really sugar is shaky because it originates from a straight stick see the play is Granny yes Grandma plus new style luv MaryJane so listen (Granny Apple last years blue ribbon production winner AKA) I, I, I ain't on the right side of my house Jane something or the other is in my room: finally after an extermination Grannie speaks once more "let my (old man) Pacman step on it". See it is home on the range so solo as it be truity speaks got a problem it is your own. But alter scenario: Z/n time; narcotics I got that candy s.p.ee..d360 Bar itch its' and Mickey Mouse for the Sultan 7 1 4er well a hem a hem, it went early in the morning like a smack chanting sugar structure 7 -one 1 +eleven and 4 do an ate 'er 8 eight 'er? Well that aint nice. NARCO says do you know them numbers change (response) Yes it is a FiX they are MF's Ope yeah Ope Douglas is it.
Surrounded by Alkaloid is both Mary and Grandma in an never ending circle of membership. French mandates declare put up their dukes... ZEN Pepsi can talk half Chocolate and your ole man Pacman down in Cuba posing as the worlds one and only Coffee Wizard "back 1:1" tis Coffee time... ||
What A Gentleman
Read much more: http://ifunny.com/pictures/iv6zfrbbu6/
Million bedbug march? What’s in store for the DNC #CelebratoryFinish?
http://twitter.com/#!/amish1979/status/243417025102364672
Awwww. Now that the face-saver in chief has moved his DNC speech to a smaller venue, the Democrats’ dreams of a dramatic balloon drop to close out the convention have been dashed.
Total down twinkles.
Dems are reportedly scrambling to throw together a “suitably celebratory finish” to replace the shower of balloons. Givers that they are, conservatives rushed to offer the Dems some inspiration.
Twitchy founder/CEO Michelle Malkin kicked off the fun.
What's your best guess for #DNC #CelebratoryFinish ? ==> http://t.co/Br7oAhCs
— Michelle Malkin (@michellemalkin) September 5, 2012
Giant Vagina Puppets kick line! #DNC #CelebratoryFinish
— Michelle Malkin (@michellemalkin) September 5, 2012
Hologram Margaret Sanger #DNC #CelebratoryFinish
— Michelle Malkin (@michellemalkin) September 5, 2012
Hee-hee. #CelebratoryFinish is trending. Keep it goin'! cc: @BDayspring #DNC
— Michelle Malkin (@michellemalkin) September 5, 2012
The hashtag trended quickly and other conservatives generously offered their services as last minute convention planners.
Two words: The Aristocrats. #CelebratoryFinish
— Stephen Green (@VodkaPundit) September 5, 2012
SEIU Purple People Beater kick line… #DNC #CelebratoryFinish
— Seattle Refugee (@SeattleRefugee) September 5, 2012
Ok, if it's an @DWStweets Dunk Tank, I'll be thrilled – @michellemalkin #DNC #CelebratoryFinish!
— Brad Dayspring (@BDayspring) September 5, 2012
OWS-style up-twinkle extravaganza!!! #dnc #CelebratoryFinish
— Seattle Refugee (@SeattleRefugee) September 5, 2012
@MGraham969 #CelebratoryFinish Elizabeth Warren doing a rain dance
— Warren Merrill (@merrill_warren) September 5, 2012
https://twitter.com/SteveLeer/status/243430910513537024
Waking up to find Patrick Duffy in the shower, and realizing the last 4 years were only a dream. #CelebratoryFinish
— Cantin Man (@Cantinman) September 5, 2012
Oprah takes the stage, “YOU get a Volt! And YOU get a Volt! And YOU get a Volt!” #CelebratoryFinish
— DjWeideman (@DjWeideman) September 5, 2012
Coordinated glitter bombing #CelebratoryFinish
— Against Obama (@against_obama) September 5, 2012
#CelebratoryFinish tickets to see #NickelodeonTV TMNT on ice for all!
— MaryLynn Mc (@MaryLynnMc) September 5, 2012
A respected actor having a dialogue with an empty chair representing Mary Jo Kopechne #DNC #CelebratoryFinish
— Anthony Bialy (@AnthonyBialy) September 5, 2012
the 58 rapists from OWS show up with their new lease on life. #CelebratoryFinish #DNC2012
— Wolf Man (@browolfman) September 5, 2012
#CelebratoryFinish #Obama reprises his YMCA parody OIHO with new #bigHollywood choreography!
— MaryLynn Mc (@MaryLynnMc) September 5, 2012
@michellemalkin #DNC #CelebratoryFinish Public sector employee union synchronized lockstep. Stunning, inspiring.
— Peter Baskind (@peterbaskind) September 5, 2012
@michellemalkin Obama dribbles Bin Laden's head through the audience and slam-dunks it #DNC #CelebratoryFinish
— Mike McNally (@notoserfdom) September 5, 2012
Perhaps a little something for the Sandra Flukes in attendance?
Blown up condoms instead of balloons? RT @michellemalkin What's your best guess for #DNC #CelebratoryFinish? http://t.co/edgDBLL9
— Briana LeClaire (@brianaleclaire) September 5, 2012
Millions of birth control pills fall from the rafters. RT @michellemalkin: What's your best guess for #DNC #CelebratoryFinish ?
— Kevin Siekierski (@KevinSiekierski) September 5, 2012
https://twitter.com/flush2012/status/243421642871697408
Perfect:
https://twitter.com/AlfVal/status/243421486503841792
Keep ‘em coming, Twitter! The Democrats are counting on you!
Insanity Wolf
Read more: https://imgflip.com/i/5j4i
19 Reasons Why Being A Quinceañera Is Just The Worst
You might look like a princess, but you definitely won’t feel like one.
So, why is being a Quinceañera the worst? Well…
3. Because your dad can sometimes be a total klutz at the worst possible moment.
4. Because your special Quinceañera video will contain INCREDIBLY BAD video effects…
7. And your video will have the same cliché shots of you awkwardly posing with your Quinceañera outfit.
8. Your choreographer will suggest that dancing with fire will make your night more memorable…
11. Your dress will INEVITABLY turn against you at the worst possible moment.
12. Dancing like this for an hour with every single family member is the bane of your existence.
13. Your chambelanes are generally your cousins who don’t have the heart to tell you “NO.”
They might tell you, “Of course, Cuz… Anything for you.” But in reality, they probably hate you for asking.
14. The limo ride is actually not as cool as it seems.
Also, pink limos should never be a thing.
15. Even though you woke up at the crack of dawn to have someone put a pound of makeup on your face…
18. Even though it might seem sweet to have your dad put on your high heels in front of everyone, it’s actually really awkward.
::awkward turtle::
19. There will come a point in the evening when you’re just over it.
Like “GET ME OUT OF THIS DRESS AND GET ME SOME SWEATPANTS” over it.
Just remember not to take it too seriously.
Reminder: You could always just go to Disneyland… Just saying.
Read more: http://www.buzzfeed.com/norbertobriceno/go-to-disneyland-instead
Is This Cross Stitch?
Read more: http://ifunny.com/pictures/cross-stitch/
The Crab-pocalypse
Read more: http://ifunny.com/pictures/crab-pocalypse/
Devastating suggestion nails ‘struggles’ of McDonald’s protesters
http://twitter.com/#!/EEElverhoy/status/408640499474370560
Holy crap, indeed. Hey, union goons and wage warriors, tell us more about your selfless “struggles.” Or better yet, tell these people:
http://twitter.com/#!/TheMaverick21/status/408639655324573696Nailed it.
http://twitter.com/#!/DrAlfredBellows/status/408640944464871424 http://twitter.com/#!/TheMaverick21/status/408640324760662016This one’s for all the fast food protesters out there:
http://twitter.com/#!/RMHC/status/408623191318593536Maher takes another sexist shot at Palin
http://twitter.com/#!/billmaher/status/211248454473752577
Bill Maher is a donor to the Obama Super PAC, and he continues to make outrageously sexist comments such as this one.
Has anyone invented the vaudeville hook for twitter yet? Asking for @billmaher
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) June 9, 2012
@CAAmyO that's not even funny, that's fucking stupid! Ugh. @billmaher
— Harry (@Tark31) June 9, 2012
@billmaher you are obsessed with palin….pathetic
— Scott Peterson (@scottyp333) June 9, 2012
@billmaher Bill, maybe Twitter isn't your thing. #hackjoke
— Just Jimmy (@looney1971) June 9, 2012
Read more: http://twitchy.com/2012/06/08/maher-takes-another-sexist-shot-at-palin/
Off to the races
Read more: https://imgflip.com/gif/b59o4