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And everybody loses their minds
Category: Anxiety
If you know what I mean
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Grumpy Cat
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X, X Everywhere
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One Does Not Simply
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Zurg told Buzz Lightyear that he is not Luke Skywalker.
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Mary Landrieu blames sloppy bookkeeping for taxpayer-funded campaign flights
http://twitter.com/#!/Raffiwilliams/status/510531979813462017
The Times-Picayune is reporting that Sen. Mary Landrieu on Friday issued the results of an internal investigation that uncovered $33,700 in campaign flights that were charged to her Senate account.
Mary Landrieu internal investigation finds $33,700 in improperly charged flights http://t.co/GQZoW4NU24
— NOLA.com (@NOLAnews) September 12, 2014
Landrieu blamed sloppy book keeping for the controversy:
“The review I ordered last month found these mistakes stemming from sloppy book keeping. I take full responsibility. They should have never happened, and I apologize for this,” Landrieu said. “A new system has been established that has been successfully used by a number of senate offices to provide a safeguard from this happening in the future.”
Landrieu blames sloppy bookkeeping: “I take full responsibility. This should have never happened & I apologize…” http://t.co/reYbSCMbyx
— James Hohmann (@jameshohmann) September 12, 2014
The $33,727.02 Landrieu is paying back is only 11% percent of total charged to federal govt for chartered flights: http://t.co/reYbSCMbyx.
— James Hohmann (@jameshohmann) September 12, 2014
Bill Cassidy demands Mary Landrieu release/review all her flight records back to 1997 — not just 2002 — for possible reimbursement.
— James Hohmann (@jameshohmann) September 12, 2014
RNC communications director Sean Spicer was quick to jump on the news.
43 = how many flights @MaryLandrieu is reimbursing taxpayers 4 her campaign trips. Thats not a book keeping problem, thats incompetence.
— Sean Spicer (@seanspicer) September 12, 2014
.@MaryLandrieu repays almost $34K for flights via @Gannett http://t.co/jTXsPRz9cg
— Sean Spicer (@seanspicer) September 12, 2014
Report: @MaryLandrieu Billed Taxpayers for Campaign Trips Dating Back to 2000 @NRO http://t.co/EPuaDeDAWq
— Sean Spicer (@seanspicer) September 12, 2014
RNC spokesman Michael Short told National Review Online it was no mistake that Landrieu let her self-imposed deadline of Sept. 8 pass before releasing the report. “With at least 9 more potentially illegal taxpayer-funded charter flights in question, it’s clear why Senator Landrieu decided not to release her report on time,” he said. “These flights suggest a longstanding pattern of abuse of taxpayer dollars dating back to her first term in office – not a bookkeeping error – and a strong contempt for hardworking Louisiana taxpayers”
19 Easy Dinners That Will Impress The Heck Out Of Your Date
Your lady or gentleman caller never has to know that their perfect meal wasn’t actually hard to make.
1. Coconut-crusted tilapia with a pretty pomegranate salsa:
You get points for using unusual ingredients, even when it isn’t actually any more complicated. Get the recipe.
2. A low-maintenance but very chic kale risotto:
The beauty of this vegetarian risotto is that you bake it instead of standing there stirring for 20 minutes, so you can devote your undivided attention to your bae. Store-bought pesto is totally fine if you don’t have time to DIY. Get the recipe.
3. Individual steaks with sweet balsamic-roasted cherry tomatoes:
You could cover a piece of cardboard in roasted cherry tomatoes and it would be delicious. But steak is much better than cardboard. Get the recipe.
4. Perfectly seared scallops with herb-infused brown butter:
Scallops are so fast to cook that you can do it while your date is watching and show them how talented you are with a frying pan. (Just maybe do a practice round first?) Serve these with a starchy side or plenty of good bread to soak up the sauce. Get the recipe.
5. Roasted sweet potatoes topped with a pretty mix of chickpeas, tomatoes and herb sauce:
Just act like you came up with that genius flavor combo yourself. No big deal. Get the recipe.
6. Cozy chicken piccata:
I don’t know about you, but if someone cooks me something with capers in it, I’m going to be very impressed. Serve these up with pasta. Get the recipe.
7. Mussels steamed in white wine:
Mussels are super fast to cook, suggest a very romantic Parisian-bistro vibe, and dealing with the shells provides a fun(ny) date activity. Get the recipe.
8. Super-simple cacio e pepe spaghetti:
Ashley Rodriguez / buzzfeed.com
This is the extremely classy, grownup version of the butter-and-cheese microwave pasta that was your passion as an 8-year-old. But it still only takes four ingredients. Get the recipe.
9. Easy roasted salmon with crispy potatoes:
Fish is so much easier to cook than you think, and salmon is the most forgiving fish of all. Get the recipe.
10. A cheesy skillet full of chicken and zucchini parm:
This borrows the things that make everyone love pizza (tomato, cheese) and applies them to something a little more impressive. Get the recipe.
11. Creamy lemon & asparagus pasta that just happens to be vegan:
Because nothing says “I love you” like working with someone’s dietary limitations and making it look easy. Get the recipe.
12. His-and-hers pork chops with mustard greens:
You can skip the quick-pickled shallots if you’re in a hurry, but they’re worth a lot of extra credit points. Try kale if you can’t find mustard greens. Get the recipe.
13. A Thai-style fish fillet cooked in its own little parchment packet:
No love interest could possibly resist their own personalized fish gift. Get the recipe.
14. Crispy chicken and Brussels sprouts that get cozy in one pan:
You brown the chicken, add the sprouts, and roast with a little broth until everything’s tender on the inside. LIKE YOUR DATE’S HEART. Get the recipe.
15. A bright coconut curry that doesn’t actually require exotic ingredients:
Nothing you can’t find at your normal grocery store, and you could make it a day ahead of time if you’re prepping for a weeknight assignation. Serve this with rice or quinoa. Get the recipe.
17. Shrimp scampi lounging on a bed of linguine:
Shrimp is the fastest thing in the world to cook, and the only other stuff you’ll need is basic pantry staples. Plus, you’ll have wine leftover! Get the recipe.
18. Pulled pork that you secretly had going in your slow cooker all day:
Serve with buns, slaw, and any other sandwich fixings you like. Get the recipe.
19. A simple veggie stir-fry that actually makes tofu taste good:
Believe me, that accomplishment will get you major points with any cute vegetarian. Get the recipe.
Read more: http://www.buzzfeed.com/rachelysanders/easy-date-dinners
Fox News’ Greg Gutfeld slams Esquire’s ‘word stamp’ recipient Tom Junod
http://twitter.com/#!/greggutfeld/status/294324663767674880
Zing! “Red Eye” host Greg Gutfeld is none too pleased with Esquire’s Tom Junod, who recently wrote a blog post slamming Fox News.
And the Twitter spat went on from there.
.@greggutfeld Welfare and food stamps — hilarious.Does Ailes write your jokes, or just approve them?
— Tom Junod (@TomJunod) January 24, 2013
Yuk, yuk, yuk. Ailes and evil Faux News! Or something.
@tomjunod that wasn’t a joke. That’s your career!
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
Heh. Junod continues attempting to throw trash talk curveballs, and Gutfeld slams them all out of the park.
.@greggutfeld From the guy who fills the all-important “funnier than Hannity” slot at Fox.
— Tom Junod (@TomJunod) January 24, 2013
.@tomjunod Wow,impressive stuff. Don’t u have a ten thousand word piece on the death of your gold fish to flesh out before noon?
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
.@greggutfeld No. On the Plight of the Professional Asshole. “He’s a pro, so he’s gotta keep on showing up.”
— Tom Junod (@TomJunod) January 24, 2013
.@tomjunod I totally get it. Once promising, now aging – copying the leftist assumptions of fellow hacks guarantees 4 bux a word.
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
.@greggutfeld I get it too — wanted to follow in the footsteps of Dave Zinczenko, but your feet were too small.
— Tom Junod (@TomJunod) January 24, 2013
@tomjunod I do have delicate feet. That is true. But they smell better than your purple prose.
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
.@greggutfeld This is the best you can do? You were funnier when you were the editor of Stuff…I mean Maxim…I mean…
— Tom Junod (@TomJunod) January 24, 2013
@tomjunod Ah, the “you were funnier when…” retort. What’s next? “What’s the deal with airline food?”Esquire is truly blessed.
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
.@greggutfeld C’mon, you’re better when you’re trying to rip off Dennis Miler than when you’re trying to rip off Seinfeld.
— Tom Junod (@TomJunod) January 24, 2013
@tomjunod I commend you, on ripping off yourself, month after month. Please continue with your thoughtful think pieces on cologne.
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
.@greggutfeld “Blah blah FOOD STAMPS grumble grumble WELFARE yawn yawn LEFTIST…” Takes a special guy to keep thinking that shit’s funny.
— Tom Junod (@TomJunod) January 24, 2013
.@tomjunod Takes a special guy to churn out dreck for an irrelevent mens mag and think he’s edgy. dude, you’re as edgy as a Hostess Snowball
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
.@greggutfeld Whoa, and to think this whole thing began when I said you were like a grownup version of the E-Trade Baby.Downhill from there.
— Tom Junod (@TomJunod) January 24, 2013
That oh-so-clever line was in Junod’s Fox-slamming post. Evidently, he has to regurgitate his own lines.
Gutfeld continues with some fun facts!
Fun fact: a capsule of Ambien contains three ground up @tomjunod articles.
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
According to PETA, reading a @tomjunod article out loud to a small pet could put it to sleep permanently.
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
Jack Kevorkian’s favorite method of euthanasia was reading a @tomjunod article out loud to his patient.
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
Warning to pet lovers: When you line a bird cage with a @tomjunod article, the bird will die from boredom.
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
And that concludes my @tomjunod tweets for this afternoon. Unlike Tom, I have a job.
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
Brilliance.
@greggutfeld Yeah. You can tell your staff’s in, because they started writing jokes for you.
— Tom Junod (@TomJunod) January 24, 2013
Oh, honey.
More to come? Alas, something is missing.
@gabrielsnyder @tomjunod agreed
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) January 24, 2013
We’ll meet you again on Twitter, fellas. Only next time, bring the beer!
Corny Horny Harry
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