Everyone worries. But at times our lives bog down with too much worry, which impacts appetite, lifestyle, relationships, sleep, and job performance.
Worry really offers little benefit to life, so if we look at causes and prescriptions for worry our it becomes manageable.
People often worry because they enjoy it. They have a need to live with daily drama. Constant worry meters out doses of drama on an “as needed basis” and this seems normal. By dramatically acting out life issues big or small, these people stay on center stage with sympathy as their needed applause.
Uncertainty is another catalyst. The uncertainty of jobs, bills, debts, children, life changes, etc punches our worry button. People often don’t react well to changes brought on by normal life uncertainties.
But, change is a partner in life and may allow good to things happen. Take note, Charles Darwin’s research indicated that it’s not the strongest nor most intelligent that survive, but those who are most responsive to change.
Lack of knowledge or skills creates anxiety. Being in a position where we feel “in over our heads” is worrisome. Being out of the comfort zone is tough for everyone. But, the fact is you either climb your own way up to speed in knowledge and skills, or you change your surroundings.
Another contributor to worry is the lack of control. We all need some control. Even a toddler does things to exert control in an adult’s life.
We really may have more control than we realize and just don’t recognize it. But, there will always be things beyond our control and we must learn to function as things are.
Our upbringing and past life experiences will also foster anxiety. Parents have been known to create worry filled homes with an odd child called anxiety. Research indicates that we’re molded by our social environments and tend to mimic them.
Worry may come from past trauma or negative experiences. Accidents, illness, or personal witness to bad events causes anxiety. These may be justifiable causes but stick with us just the same.
Even with so many prompts for worry, it’s not as difficult to curb as you might think. But, you need the desire to change your life, and you do need to work at it.
Turning to ideas for managing worry, Winston Churchill reflecting back on his own troubles found that many never really happened. Shakespeare gives another clue when he wrote, “to thine own self, be true”.
Honest self-reflection is a good step toward managing anxiety and counseling opens a door to personal discovery. The more clarity we gain the more quickly we move toward positive ground.
We have natural tendencies toward vagueness and generalization. Along with counseling, sharing with a trusted family member or close friend, or even a personal worry diary can help clarify issues.
Guarding against falling into the “what if trap” is a necessary for worry management. Conjuring “what if” scenarios is of little value since most of the plots we create rarely happen. So instead of imagining things that may never happen, eliminate the “what if’s”.
Find ways to embrace the uncertainty of life. At times, life is a great venture. At times, it requires problem-solving. At times, it totally stumps us. But, each moment in life inevitably happens with little predictability. Worry doesn’t change this.
Start an exercise program. Walk, bike, swim, jog, stretch, etc. Exercise goes a long way toward eliminating stress and anxiety. A moderate daily routine of exercise will boost your mental health.
Finally, worry does little good, fixes nothing, and causes anxiety. Self-understanding is central to living a worry free life. So, embrace life, be honest with yourself and worry less.
